Thursday, June 28, 2007

Any less loserish????



Term 'o' the day: Bagel Butt Crack - when your bagel has no hole in the middle, only a little butt crack.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

How Fascinating!!!

Subtitle: Raising a purposeful child.

Raising a male child who has boundless energy and is now learning to stand and cruise on his own has a way of frazzling the nerves…

And polarizing beliefs.

In witnessing Jay’s adventures, we found ourselves confronted with a number of parenting issues – not the least of which is baby-proofing.

We have a number of …uh…hazards in our home for some body who is short, has poor balance, cannot talk and is only just learning to walk.

We protected against the things that could KILL him…we have latches on the cupboards that contain poisonous items or glass/heavy items. We have plug covers on all plugs. We have gates at the stairs and the crib lowered to its lowest possible point. It won’t be long before we add some kind of protection to keep him INSIDE the house and OUT of certain rooms.

But beyond these obvious safety precautions, we hit the gray area:

I’m not a germophobe, nor am I the type to prevent him from touching something he’s dropped on the floor (he LIVES on the floor…if anyone has antibodies to what’s on the floor, it’s him!). You’re probably not going to find me constantly rinsing off his pacifier or feverishly vacuuming the floor.

We chose not to put guards around our coffee table or fireplace hearth (which is only 2 inches off the ground anyway), not to remove the dog bowl from the floor and not to place objects out of his reach (unless they are small enough for him to choke on.)

We want him to pay attention to the world around him and understand from his experiences that this is hard or that will poke and make a purposeful decision about how to navigate.

I think this approach will garner praise from some, but criticism from others.

My perspective is that you cannot learn to navigate a pointy, object-filled world if everything has bumpers. And you certainly do not learn what you should and should not touch if everything you might touch is placed out of your reach. You do not learn what to treasure, how to respect other people’s boundaries, or how to get out of tough situations in the padded, protected, sterilized world.

Our son has evidence that mommy believes this way…he is a walking bump, bruise, and scratch factory…

However, I believe firmly that children both hear and comprehend more than we give them credit for and that there is no better teacher than natural consequence.

In this new process of navigation and risk, we found ourselves telling him to “be careful” a lot.

So…we made a choice not to say it anymore. Why should we always “be careful”? What is the real risk if we are not “careful” in some situations?

And more importantly, how do I parent my child through the discovery of new things? How do I teach safety without teaching fear? How do I teach him to learn from his mistakes and use the experiences as reference for the next step?

With children my son’s age, you don’t really have to worry much about squashing his resolve to get things done. He has boundless energy and an endless willingness to try things. It is this spirit we want to continue to foster in him.

I can hear some of you saying, “But he’s so young…”

Yes.

He is.

But the patterns of our lives are supposedly SET by the time we are three. If you take the approach of conventional wisdom, by that age, we have been told “no” and “be careful” a bazillion times. We have been caged, contained, and strapped-in for virtually every situation. We have often had every corner padded, every stair gated, every cupboard latched and every door locked. It just doesn’t seem like the kinds of patterns that build a successful, out-of-the-box thinker can be fostered in an over-cautious home.

That doesn’t mean I’m going to be letting him touch a hot stove or play in his pool unsupervised. Frankly, he doesn’t even navigate the living room unsupervised.

Just because I’m watching doesn’t mean I’m interfering with his process. I recognize there are areas FAR outside of his expertise. But I feel he needs to get himself into those situations and seek assistance rather than just not getting into them in the first place.

Often he surprises me and handles difficult things quite well.

It’s just so important that he be able to look at a situation and make some choices about how much caution he needs use, without me creating artificial fear that might prevent him from trying something and being great at it.

He needs to understand that actions have consequences…and that getting hurt doesn’t mean you quit… that sometimes you will get in over your head, but its ok to ask for help.



Now, instead of “be careful” you might hear, “Great Job!” “How fascinating!” “Wow!!!” or “You go, buddy!”

We try not to react when he falls or stumbles.

If he cries, we pick him up, tell him he’s ok and kiss it to make it better. Then send him back on his path of discovery.

And we talk…a lot. We try to give him the words that describe what he’s doing.

We ask him a lot of questions. And we wait for him to answer (even though we don’t understand a word of it, its about the dialog.)

And hopefully, we can teach him to look out over his life, assess his situation, decide how much risk he’s willing to take and then proceed with confidence through whatever it is.

And if he falls, we pray he will say, “How fascinating!” and get back on the path to discovery.

Have a purposeful day, everyone!!!

Monday, June 25, 2007

I hate the rules...

Now…before I get off on my tangent, let me just say…I LOVE rules…meaningful, constructive rules. I completely believe in structure, in freedom within boundaries, in providing guidance in a wide-open world, in frameworks that are functional and useful. I most certainly will raise my son with boundaries and manners and a sense of decorum...

HOWEVER…

I despise these rules that are there just so that somebody who isn’t capable and/or conscious can feel better about themselves for putting a stranglehold on everyone else. Why can’t we celebrate how different and amazing we all are?????

Most especially, I hate the rules that are UNSPOKEN…the assumptions we seem to make collectively as a society that place false fences around those truly seeking growth and positive change…the assumptions we like to assign to things we don’t know or understand, to the things we are afraid to undertake, in an effort to make us feel better about our own choices…and lack of courage…like:

Tattoos mean you are bad, loose, or lost (or were at some point in your life)…or, Lord help us, a follower of the devil…(NOT!)

White in winter should only be winter white…

Hair is required to be a “natural” color to be acceptable…(such a shame this one…because there REALLY are some people out there who look great in blue and it’s a shame their hair cannot compliment their skin tone in this way)…

Tan = “healthy” – White = “unhealthy”

Alcohol is required for silliness, relaxation or just plain old openness…and no party is complete without it…and silliness, relaxation and openness without it is…well…weird.

Serious = boring

Intellectual = boring and/or geek

If you raise your hands during worship in church, you must be some kind of religious freak…aka Charismatic = insane. (People…the Bible says that David DANCED before the Lord!!!! And he wasn’t doing the White-Man-Shuffle!!! You should care LESS about what everyone else in church thinks of you and MORE about what God thinks of your worship and if you are really giving it all you've got!)

Red and pink and orange and yellow should not all be worn together in one outfit unless you are under the age of 6 or over the age of 70. (I think on this one, my God-daughter Miss. H has it all right…she looks just lovely when all these colors are mixed in her outfit and she is wearing all her favorite things and she is infinitely happy looking lovely in all her favorite things, so why the heck is it not allowed between the ages of 7 and 70?)

To be attractive, you must be thin, muscular, and have really white teeth…which usually means that you are starved, cranky, sore (from the workouts) and that everything you consume must be room temperature (because hot and cold HURT bleached teeth).

You are not allowed to express your feelings if you are starved, cranky, sore and bored with everything being room temperature. It is, after all, the price of "beauty." Who is selling you this idea of beauty anyway???

Emotion = bad (this is an especially destructive rule that men seem to adore! - unless, of course, they are a musician or artist. THEN its ok...as long as its THEIR emotion and not YOURS)

To be the SAME is better than to be DIFFERENT…but you must SAY you want to be DIFFERENT so that you FIT IN and are the SAME as everyone else. Uh…huh??? Yea…its fashionable to say you are or want to be different…meanwhile, you are worried that other people might think you look silly or odd…or…gasp…out of touch with “the times.” This is a mixed message that I simply cannot wrap my head around.

Success = stuff - does anyone remember that lesson from high school economics that states that the value of an object is equal to what it costs AND what you had to give up to obtain it? What are you giving up?

“Organic” is better – FYI – e-coli is “organic” and so is the untreated water that it grew in that was sprayed over the fields where the “organic” spinach was grown. PS…if it’s a processed, frozen tv dinner that you heat in the microwave, “organic” just means you paid more for zero nutritional value than the guy that bought the Hungry Man Salsbury Steak meal with fried potatoes and apple sauce. “Organic” does NOT always mean healthy! (or even organic for that matter)

The more activities your children are in the “smarter” they will be. (of course they will be too exhausted to demonstrate any of that “smarts” and are probably cranky, sore and attempting to control their emotions over the condition of their lives.)

And finally, my most favorite of all unspoken rules:

If you and I see things differently, somebody is wrong. And that somebody is you.

Have a thoughtful day!!!

Peace!!!

Friday, June 22, 2007

Change, Progress and Surround Sound systems

"All change is not growth, as all movement is not forward." (e. glasgow)

Security in sameness. Is new and different always better? Why are we always seeking to have something more stylish (who are you allowing to define style anyway?), different, trendier (trendy always gets boring quickly does it not?)? (Rebecca Sower)


So... a couple of days ago, Ali turned me on to a post on Rebecca's Blog , which got me thinking...

Lots of things change...Scott is fond of saying "All in the name of progress." To which, I'm fond of saying, "Is it progress???"

I'm just not certain that I enjoy the kinds of changes that happen around me.

Does that mean I'm getting old?

Or that I've finally figured out that its not all about the change, change, change...but about what is meaningful, soulful, purposeful, deliberate, with attention to the details...

Scott got a surround sound system as a gift from his dad on Father's Day. Frankly, I hate the thing. There are lots of reasons...one, we don't need it in our small living room. Two, it leaves my already very full living room feeling cluttered and overstuffed. Three, it encourages loud tv watching...something I've grown less and less patient about. The noise gets on my nerves. And four...it represents something we definately do not need.

I was completely irritated at seeing the different components added to the space around the TV and one word came to me that has just been poking at me ever since...

unnecessary

UNNECESSARY

I'm weary of all this unnecessary consumerism. WHY do we need big screened tvs and all the speakers and 10 million channels of junk? WHY do we need DVD players in our cars? WHY do we need to get our e-mail on our cell phones while we are having dinner with our family?

I am as enamored with technology as the next guy. I like shiny cool new things...but I'm really not convinced that they add one single good thing to our lives. And the pressure to keep up with the Jones' as it were, is a whole lot of pressure.

About five years ago, we started a plan to be completely debt free. Its hard work to be debt free. You forgo some cool things and the ability to buy now, pay later when you decide to be debt free.

But I can honestly say, you really get in touch with how much you buy when you decide NOT to anymore. I found out that $40 for a pair of sandals could be a lot of money if that same $40 could buy my groceries for the week. I found out that spending the money on classic, reliable clothing was better spent than chasing the trends. I also found out I look better that way!

There are some "new" things I think are marvelous...like Ipods...for me this is a marvel..a breakthrough. I can buy my music on line and load it into my ipod. I don't have to mess with cds or tapes...I buy one piece of hardware and the music is all bits and bytes. It doesn't fill up landfills when I'm done with it...it doesn't require the mining of petroleum or the pollution of producing the plastics. Its an ingenious thing. AND...I can listen to educational things - books on tape, sermons, and lectures in the form of podcasts. Absolutely brilliant technology, this I-pod. To me...its progress.

THe surround sound system...not so much.

Now, when I see a $600 flat screened tv, I think about money for Jay's college, groceries, or paying an extra payment on the car. I think about my two perfectly good TV's taking up space in a landfill somewhere...not able to bio-degrade because of the many manufacturing steps that have gone into making the raw materials so permanent that generations from now, these devices will still be completely intact.

I don't need a flat screen.

Or a surround sound system.

Or anything else like this.

What I need...what would be real progress...is time. Isn't it funny that for all our progress, we still have to work so hard...and that we usually are working hard so that we can keep up with the progress????

Seems so backwards to me.

I'd rather just have the time with God, time with Jay, time to create, time to laugh and learn and grow and cherish. These things would enrich my life (and my wallet) and they are far more progressive than spending time in front of a flat screen tv with a surround sound system getting fat, lazy and stupid.

Based on the number of flat screen tv's being sold at Costco, I think mine might e an odd perspective...but its the perspective I remember my parents having...Its the perspective I always thought was silly...Its about the quality of life...not the quantity...and its about quality NOT being about the quantity of things you have...

Now, I have Scott and Jay and a front yard and great neighbors...and I cherish these times and these moments ever so much more than an expensive gadget that will just contribute in some way to my carbon footprint and the mess of landfills and petroleum pollutants.

I've been reading about The 100-Mile Diet: A Year of Local Eating Brilliant approach to removing excess in our lives and attempting to get in touch with who we are and were we really live - specifically when it comes to food. It struck a chord with me. Truely, it wouldn't be a hard thing to do here in North Carolina...nor in Southern California where I used to live. But it WOULD be difficult if you lived in, say...Phoenix or Las Vegas. Still the approach is what I find important.

Examining how much we really need to to have and how much waste goes into us having the things we have. Making different choices about the stuff we choose to include in our lives. Its about being purposeful and thoughtful as a consumer. Perhaps we spend so much of our lives struggling with emotional junk becuase we willingly inlude so much unnecessary physical junk in our lives every second of every day.

I've really been focusing on the quality of my life...on the way that I spend my precious resouces...on having a meaningful life...and a full life...not a full-of-meaningless-stuff life...

I think that change is not always progress...and if progress is only measured in dollars and cents, measured in what you have in your living room instead of what you have in your heart and mind, that we miss the point of life entirely. Success is not about how much you have to spend on your funeral...its about how you spend your life...

Here is my challenge...what can you do without that is just polluting your life? As hard as it may be...get rid of it.

Just toss it out and move on...

Happy pondering, everyone...

Have a meaningful, purposeful, soulful, deliberate weekend, everyone!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Paper, pool and food...

Gosh, that sounds like a delightful title...

How I would love to be by the pool reading the paper and having some snacks...

Alas, it is not to be...

Working on some thoughts about change and progress and how much I hate surround sound systems...but more on that tomorrow...lol...

In the mean time - I give you paper, pool and food....

Reading the paper - Jayden-style...the only important part is the ads...




First day in a brand new pool...he loves to be splashed...it makes him laugh hysterically...


A sure sign we have a real boy - he's already raiding the fridge...


Oh...and speaking of food...this is one cool band for toddlers...the music is really good. I SO appreciate the good musicians that do childrens music...becuase I SO HATE mindless children's music...lol...



And a couple more...really cool music done by real bands...so very cool....love these also...





Until tomorrow...

I bid you fond adieu (as Willy Wonka Gene-Wilder-style would say)

Thursday, June 14, 2007

A Different World

Loving this today....for those of you who are Idol fans, but not necessarily country music fans, these are the lyrics to Bucky Covington's new single...And while I don't necessarily agree with the first line (I know my mother didn't smoke nor drink), it got me all nostalgic for my childhood.

EDIT: Mom informs me that she was VERY careful with the lead based paint thing too...oh, and though my dad took his belt off, he never actually had to use it on ME (the threat was enough!)

We were born to mothers who smoked and drank
Our cribs were covered in lead-based paint
No childproof lids
No seatbelts in cars
Rode bikes with no helmets
and still here we are
Still here we are

We got daddy's belt when we misbehaved
Had three TV channels you got up to change
No video games and no satellite
All we had were friends and they were outside
Playing outside

School always started the same everyday
the pledge of allegiance, then someone would pray
not every kid made the team when they tried
We got disappointed but that was alright
We turned out alright

No bottled water
We'd drink from a garden hose
And every Sunday,
All the stores were closed.

It was a different life
When we were boys and girls
Not just a different time
It was a different world

I remember playing in the mud and drinking from a hose - you had to wait for the water to run through if the hose had been in the sun.

I remember that Grandpa used to give me 50 cents and I could safely walk to the corner convenience store in their little town and buy a Coke and a Hershey bar with my two shiny quarters. I remember the day I had to have two quarters and a nickel becuase the price had gone up.

I most certainly remember the Pledge and I can vividly remember the first time I played a video game in an arcade. I also remember my first personal "video" game - Simon - do they even still make Simon?

I remember very well the three channels and the TV with the channel dial that only went to 13...

I remember the first time we got cable and a remote control...

And mom's first microwave (that thing was HUGE and she had it FOREVER!)

And I very fondly remember the joy of bouncing around in the back of a truck, no seatbelt required, and you only had to get knocked over one time by the take-off to learn to hold on.

It really was a different world.

Have a fantastic nostalgic day!!!

Peace!

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Frustration and Big Dreams…

Up at 5 am this morning…well..the alarm went off at 5 am.

WHY:

Becuase I'm FRUSTRATED with myself, with my LACK of self-discipline, lately.

The plan: go walk.

Hit the snooze…then DREAMED I was out walking in the cool morning air…

Then the alarm went off at 5:07…lol…alas, walking in one’s sleep is NOT the same as the actual walking..

Snuck downstairs, fed the dog, put on my shoes and hit the road.

1.4 miles in 26 minutes.

I've grown increasingly...um...exasperated by the length of my to do list...

At not getting things done…

At how much list is left at the end of a day...

At finding there is only time for Jay at the end of the day and ignoring my list...only to find myself happily played out with a huge list the next morning.

So…I begin earlier and try to get oxygen in my lungs…

I start out my day differently...so that the entire direction of my day can be shifted. I'm looking for that paradigm shift...I'm looking for that inspiration and that drive and that determination that is so much a part of my character. I'm looking to check things off that darn to do list..or at least to check off more than I have to add!

I'm up at this hour generally anyway...so...getting out of the house for 30 minutes to walk...to empty my head and "fill the well" seems in order. Its not a new perspective really...its an "I know this works, why am I not doing it?" perspective.

There are things I know work...walks and being careful with my diet and journaling and defending my creative time. They just make mommy a happier person...and that makes all of us happier (cuz if momma ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy! HA HA!!!)

It was good…I listened to Joyce Meyer and watched the sun come up. I felt energized and alive and not like I needed a quad espresso to get to lunch time.

FAB-U-LOUS!

Here's a good question...why the heck do I let myself get off track? good question. I'll have to ponder that and come to the root of it sometime. I NEED to get to the root of it...to dig and just do the work...do the things I KNOW work...

Heard a sermon on Saturday night that has been sticking with me.

The big idea: Dream a dream so big that only God can accomplish it.

I already have.

He already did.

I have a home...a son...a husband...a church...a ladies group...a great job...a different life in a new place. I had a wonderful church and group of ladies...I had a decent job...but, I never dreamed I'd have a home or a son...I only barely allowed myself to dream that I'd have a husband, a great marriage. These are the things of a dream fulfilled...a dream I always had out there but that I never really believed would come to fruition...I never let go of the "some day" on these things. And God has been faithful to me...more faithful to me than I was to Him, that is for sure...

I’ve been resting in the wake of the fruition of that dream… Learning to be a mom, to find new balance, to pay attention to the details of life so that I am aware of what my son sees and hears and observes on a daily basis. I have been accepting and marvelling and trying to share the fruit of this dream...

Still...part of me has been sort of struggling becuase I'm not used to the thought that a dream has come true. I've floundered a bit becuase I cannot get used to the idea that my somewhere, someday dream is NOW...Its so much JOY, so much love and happiness I never thought I'd I have.

Its a bit like the day after I graduated from college. I'd worked so hard to get to that day...and the next day I woke up and the first thougth in my head was "Now what?" It terrified me!

There has been that part of me that is terrified...becuase the things I've dreamed have come true...and I haven't really thought too much about what follows a dream coming true...(Happily ever after???? honestly...that sounds a little boring...dangerous even!)

But now...

Now it is time to begin dreaming of what is to come...of how He will move me to share these things with others in new ways...of friends I will make and places I will see and new things I will experience, try, master, share...

We prayed in church on Saturday night for the next big dream…for an impossible dream that only God could accomplish..

I’m praying for clarity and direction and a vivid image of what He has in store for me. I realize that we are only to take things one step at a time. But I believe that He equips us uniquely and with purpose to fulfill certain things in His plan…and I’m ready for the next assignment…He’s already given me a home and a family and a son. And I’m awakened each day to just how hard His job is with me.

This thought of a new big dream touched me…and it has my blood flowing and my eyes tipped upward and my ears perked…

Dream a dream so big that only God can accomplish it…

Alrighty then…

Peace, everyone!

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Changing....

Made some changes to my little corner of the world...

Lightened, brightened, added some RED (Love that little bit of fire...)

Also, updated my links and added some new inspirations....

I do so much in the way of reading, and searching and discovering that I thought I'd add a section on the things that I'm diggin' right now, this second...

Also, will be doing some more updating to my links to make things a little more current and "me".

Next thing...new picture...THAT one was taken two years ago...sigh...its a good one, though...I'll have to work hard to replace it...thinking I might try something a little different...we shall see.

Have a FABULOUS DAY everyone!!!

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Scrapping and turtles...

Completely candy post today...

I managed to accomplish some layouts...

Scott and I have compromised and I can now have a few hours of unintererrupted scrapbooking time on Wednesday nights...WOO HOO!!!






A few weeks ago, I got a package in the mail from my dad...among the beautiful carvings inside were these two turtles...I Love them!!!




(note to self: need to paint the hall way!!!)

I took these last night...I believe this means we're in for an adventerous summer...



Peace, everyone!!!

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Inspiration...

I’ve been searching for inspiration…for something to fill the well. For things that will motivate me, lift me…give me that “AH HA!!!” sensation.

I’ve rather fallen in love with the idea of inspiration books. I’ve currently got two notebooks going…one with images and words in sort of a more random gathering method and a smaller one that I keep with me all the time where I take notes from sermons or conversations or random ideas or observations.

I’ve also been keeping sketches and pictures of ideas for my scrapbooking, my home, raising Jayden, etc.

My earnest wish for the moment is to be able to spread these things all out on the floor in my office and see what I really have.

My organized, compartmental, analyst brain wants to put these ideas in separate places…one notebook for house ideas, one notebook for Jayden ideas, one notebook for recipes, one notebook for those random things that inspire me, etc, etc, etc. Unfortunately, that tends to create clutter in my life where I certainly do not need any clutter.

My creative self has something else entirely in mind. My creative self wants these inspirations and ideas all in one book…one messy, haphazard, collage of the things that awaken me, with my notes and my musings, my arrows and circles and messy handwriting all about, noting what I like, what I don’t like, why its in my book. I think my creative self wants my eyes to really see how all the things that inspire me fit together, how they all work to make my style my style.

I believe I am becoming. I think our lives are a matter of discovering who we are, of unearthing the secrets that we are born with, that we are given by God as seeds tucked away in the deep recesses of our hearts. I believe firmly that we not only grow up, but we also grow into ourselves. But there is a catch…you have to seek after these things and in the right context. You have to shed things like pride and anger and hurt and all of that other negative stuff, you have to be open to truth and inspiration and joy. And most of all, you have to be open to the possibility that God created you to be creative and that He provides abundantly for your inspiration.

So, I’ve been seeking inspiration…so far, this morning, this is what I’ve found…Its all very superficial, I suppose. There are no great love stories in here at the moment…it is more an exercise in seeing and understanding what it is I love and why…

This inspires me because of its neatness…the cleanness…the gorgeous shade of blue…and the hand-drawn line is gorgeous simply because it is hand-drawn:

This inspires me for its neatness also, but also because it is old. The finish, the imperfections, the very aspect of imagining how it was once used and recognizing how much the world has changed…

This inspires me because of its remarkable art quality. It is lush and rich, layers of visual stimulus…and it’s a scrapbook page…fantastic.

This inspires me because of the emotion and nostalgia…this is something that we can all look at and feel…

This inspires me because of its vibrancy…it looks so fun!

This inspires me because I want to get ahold of it and write in it. And I find it such a clever way to recycle and re-purpose. It’s a really amazing concept! This particular one also inspires me to re-discover my urge to sell some of my own work, to find a way to use my art as a lifestyle instead of a hobby.

This is another one that inspires me because of its collage quality and the lushness of it. I just want to dig into it.

And this inspires me because its has that aged patina…and because I’m fascinated with clocks. I think that my obsession with time and organization is part of this fascination with clocks. I absolutely adore them…

The most striking thing this set of inspirations is the imperfections…I find the imperfections beautiful. Each of these is truly unique because of their deviations from perfection…how enlightening.

When I drive to work each day, I pass through several beautiful neighborhoods, past beautiful trees, gardens, homes and businesses. Each day, in its turn, brings something new. Now that I’ve traveled this route for a year, I’ve begun to see the cycle of the changes. It too is inspiring, how nature and the city and the people ebb and flow, work together to provide a landscape that is always interesting.

Inspirations are largely a matter of paying attention, of unearthing and revealing, of noticing what is the same in the things we notice and what is different…

I know that my son inspires me daily to live out loud. Lord knows one HAS to pay attention to a cute little baby. But I can safely say, I don’t think I’ve ever in my life sung so many silly songs and danced around my house so much. The very act of paying attention to him – and giving him my undivided attention – has opened up a part of me that was not normally open for everyone to see. I don’t care anymore that strangers hear me singing and talking to my son as I stroll through the grocery store. I’ve stopped taking that part of myself so seriously.

I find I must learn and grow and seek out inspirations outside my normal sphere of influence…and it is in this seeking that I find out who I am, that I discover those seeds that God has given me, those clues to my true self.

I encourage you to pay attention today, to seek, to be inspired…

Enjoy!!!

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Amazing…

How silent it can be at 3:00 am. Its so quiet I don’t even want to breathe. I almost stayed awake to see who would break the silence first. But the quite enveloped me like a warm blanket, eased the tension out of my shoulders and the crease from between my eyes…and I fell asleep thinking, “How could it be that quiet???”

How healing it can be to sleep until 7 am instead of 5 am.

How hard this little guy of mine works to get to what he wants, to get around the way he wants, to communicate and to learn and to discover and to grow – all with a huge smile on his face and a little bounce, bounce, bounce.

How much you learn about how God loves us while raising a child. How many times over the last few months have I asked, “What is he doing?” and thought, “He’s not like that!” and mused, this is what it must be like for God growing us up as Christians. I am patient when he wants to walk – even though he cannot yet walk. I am patient when he pulls my hair – even while removing my locks from his tight little grip. I am patient when he awakens at night – just to be held and rocked back to sleep. I am patient when he wants to hold the spoon – and makes a pure mess of himself. I am patient when he wants me to pick him up and I want him to crawl and we have a little battle of the wills. And I am overwhelmed with love and joy when he turns his rambunctious, adventurous, care-to-the-wind little face up to me and smiles his pure bliss smile.

How much drama can be assigned to something that turns out to be very minor in real life.

How remarkable it is to have a new shirt or two in the wardrobe.

How good Hummus and schwerma and fresh pita taste when you haven’t had them in awhile. How even more refreshing they are when eaten outside in the lovely warm breeze surrounded by trees and old buildings and plenty of subjects for the eye.

How rewarding it is to get organized and to understand just what is and what isn’t on the list. How creativity can bloom when the “have to’s” are all out on paper in the order in which they need to be accomplished. Organization is so truly freeing!

Choosing to be a contribution today…

Choosing to give everyone an “A”

Choosing to remember not to take myself so seriously.

Choosing to remember its all made up!!!

Peace, everyone!!!